Dare the Red Eye characters!
by snowflakes and ink
Summary: Yep, right here you can dare ANY of the Red Eye characters to do ANYTHING! You heard me, ANYTHING!
1. Introduction

Chapter 1

Gertrude: Hi, welcome to Red Eye Truth or Dare. In this game, you can make the any characters do anything, there are no rules in this game, but bear in mind this is T rated so….

Lisa: So in order to continue to the next chapter, we have to get at least THREE requests, each from three different people

Keefe: You can ask any characters, including all the minor ones

Cynthia: But any viewer is allowed to ask as many questions as they want!

Jackson: So hurry and start typing!

Lisa's dad: and of course I am always here to pass out cookies to everyone

Gertrude: So ask away and see you next time!

Jackson: we are waiting!


	2. Episode 1

Gertrude: Hi, welcome back, everyone, to Dare the Red eye characters. We have three requests from readers, and thank you all for your kind reviews.

Jackson: Shall we get a move on?

Gertrude: Do you have issues?

Jackson: Yeah, you

Gertrude: 'ignores Jackson' anyway, Lisa, read the first dare for us

Lisa: with pleasure. The first dare is from** Patriot16: I dare Jackson to dance the ballet **'evil grin'

Jackson: what the-

Gertrude: Jackson, the stage is yours

Jackson: I am not going to-

Gertrude: 'waves contract in his face' Yo, what's this?

Jackson: 'grumbling'

Gertrude: Costume! 'Poofs Jackson into a bloodstained tutu' Music! 'The theme Swan Lakes comes on'

Lisa: 'sniggers'

_Jackson proceeded to start jumping and twirling uncoordinatedly across the stage, much to everyone's amusement/disgust; tripping several times and at last ended by throwing himself off the stage in a poorly imitated ballerina leap._

Jackson: 'curtsies to everyone' Ta-dah

Keefe: 'twitches'

Joe: 'to Lisa' and you told me he is a dangerous hit man!???!!!?

Lisa: he is, WAS

Jackson: 'still in the tutu' I still am

Gertrude: alright, Jackson, you can take off that tutu now so that we can move on the next dare

Jackson: You know, this costume is kinda comfortable to be in

Pause

Joe: I always knew that guy's gay

Keefe: I agree

Gertrude: why does that sounds wrong? 'Poofs Jackson back into his previous clothes' much better. Anyway, end of this rather……………disturbing…….thing. Jackson, read the next dare for us.

Jackson: Fine. This dare is from **AlexaJ: Haha, this sounds interesting. I dare Lisa to makeout with Jackson. XD**

Lisa: 'horrified look on face'

Jackson: 'grins'

Joe: 'Slaps Jackson' PERVERT!

Jackson: 'still grinning stupidly'

Lisa: aargggggh! Fine! 'Grabs Jackson and kissed him'

Jackson: 'swoons and collapsed'

Joe: well, at least he's down

Jackson: 'began giggling and squealing in unconscious state'

Everyone:……………

Gertrude: ooooookay, Jackson, wake up

Jackson: 'not waking up'

Gertrude: someone give Jackson a kick or a slap

Joe: I would willingly do that 'slaps Jackson and kicked him in the cheap spot'

Jackson: 'woke up' oooowwww!! What the-

Gertrude: nice! Joe, read the next dare for us!

Joe: 'still glaring at Jackson' the next dare is from **..know. : Great idea! I'm interested in seeing where this whole thing goes!!  
Let's see, I dare Joe, Jackson, and Keefe to give the girls a little strip-tease!! HAHA!! That would be funny to see. . .well, hope you go with my dare!**

Keefe: I am a respectable man of high degrees, I am not going to-

Gertrude: 'yawns and waved contract in Keefe's face'

Keefe: 'sobs'

Jackson: it seems that I am awfully popular in this game

Joe: WTF

Jackson: let's not waste anymore time, MUSIC!

_Sexy upbeat music started playing. Jackson took off his shirt and flung it in Keefe's face. Joe tried to strangle Jackson with his belt. Then Keefe, who had Jackson's shirt on his head which was covering his eyes bumped into Joe, sending him flying off the stage. Jackson then kicked Keefe in the stomach, causing Keefe stumbling to the other end of the stage. Joe then climbed up the stage once more, took off his shirt and whacked Jackson with it, although it did not cause much damage. Jackson grabbed Joe's shirt and strangled Joe. Keefe threw Jackson's shirt off himself and ran towards Jackson in a rage. Jackson dodged, causing Keefe to miss and fell off the stage. The strip-tease ended up in chaos. _

Gertrude: um, gentlemen? The reader did not include FIGHTING in the request

Jackson: 'the only surviving man' yeah, I just want to spice it up a little

Lisa: 'looking at Joe, who was lying on the ground' you know, you killed my father

Jackson: 'shrugs' I should have done that before this

Gertrude: uh-huh, anyway, thanks, Jackson, FOR KILLING EVERYONE!

Jackson: 'smirks' my pleasure

Gertrude: well, that concludes our horribly disturbing chapter, please comment with any dare you wish! We won't (or... can't) refuse any dare. See you next time!


	3. Episode 2

Gertrude: Welcome back to Dare the Red Eye characters! Before I continue, I would like to express my thanks to all the awesome reviewers!

Jackson: and I would like to express my urge to kill you

Keefe: there should be no violence what-so-ever

Jackson: 'death glare'

Keefe: MOMMY!

Gertrude: SHUT UP! Anyway, on with the dares! Lisa, please read the next dare for us

Lisa: alright, this is from **mandy: I dare jackson to fall in love. with lisa's dad. just for one episode. -snickers-  
please?**

Pause

Keefe: heh heh

Lisa's dad: uh….I am needed somewhere else…so….seeya 'tries to run but was forced to sit back down by two security guards wearing hamsters

Jackson: NO WAY am I ever going to fall in love with that….old person

Gertrude: you two are going to be locked up till you guys, well, you know 'clicks room into place'

Jackson: 'is dragged away screaming' YOU CAN'T MAKE ME! LET ME GO! NOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Lisa's dad: well, if the reviewer says so…..

Jackson: 'tearing up the carpets' NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Everyone: 'paranoid'

Keefe: 'giving Lisa the look' well, it is just you and me now, baby

Lisa: 'punches Keefe' HANDS OFF! PERVERT!

Gertrude: well, let's take a break and see how our two…………ga-guys are doing.

************************5 hours commercial*******************************

Gertrude: welcome back! Let's see how ol' Jackson's doing! 'clicks the door open'

_Jackson walked out of the room, followed by Lisa's dad, Jackson sat down beside Lisa's dad and placed his arm around him. _

Gertrude: welllllllll?

Lisa's dad: 'to Jackson' well, how could I not notice your gorgeous eyes before?

Lisa: 'throws up in a paper bag'

Gertrude: 'turning green' um, wow?

Jackson: 'giggles and blushes'

Gertrude: 'snatches paper bag from Lisa' gimme that 'pukes'

Keefe: 'turning blue from lack of oxygen'

Everyone: 'throws up all over the ground' STOP IT!!

Gertrude: 'the color of lime' let's….just go on, Jackson, please read the next dare

Jackson: the next dare is from **Scaramouche Khashoggi****: ****I dare Jackson to make Lisa the perfect sea breeze. **

Lisa's dad: he should be making one for me!

Jackson: 'take out glass and ice cubes' um, what now?

Gertrude: 'poofs a _how to make a perfect sea breeze for the dummies' _

Jackson: 'reading from the book' first, fill glass with ice cubes. That's easy. Next, pour vodka, grapefruit juice and cranberry juice over ice cubes. Gertrude, could you pass me the vodka?

Gertrude: 'gave Jackson a bottle of acid' here you go 'wicked grin'

Jackson: 'pouring in the acid' hmmm, cranberry juice, grapefruit juice, there you go. What's next? Third step, add a wedge of lemon. 'Dunks a whole lemon into the drink' done! Here, Lisa, your perfect sea breeze.

Lisa: 'drinks sea breeze and drops to the floor' X.X

Lisa's dad: OMG! You killed my daughter! What did you put in the sea breeze?!?!?!

Jackson: nothing! Ice cubes, grapefruit juice, cranberry juice, vodka and a lemon

Lisa's dad: sobs

Jackson: awww, come on, you still have me!

Lisa's dad: you're right 'blushes'

Jackson: wanna hold hands and skip?

Lisa's dad: okay

_Jackson and Lisa's dad held hands and skipped around the room_

Gertrude: 'picks up jaw from the ground'…………………..um, on with the next dare. Keefe!

Keefe: okay. The next dare is submitted by **AlexaJ :** **I dare Jackson and Keefe to get in a fight, and whoever loses has to pretend to be a model and wear girl's underwear and bra. **Gulp.

Jackson: did someone say fight? Gosh! I am really good at it!

Keefe: MOMMY!

Gertrude: shut up, get up and fight

Jackson: 'evil grin' prepare to die! 'wipes out K-bar and approaches Keefe menacingly'

Keefe: 'screams like a girl and ran around the place' NO! HAVE MERCY!

Jackson: 'waving a nine inch K-bar in the air' GET BACK HERE! FACE ME AND FIGHT! YOU COWARD!

Keefe: 'screams and hid behind Lisa's dad'

Lisa's dad: WTF 'steps aside'

Keefe: OMG! 'punches the air blindly' Did I get you? 'Hopefully'

Everyone: O.o

Jackson: Everywhere else but

Gertrude: that's not a fight!

Jackson: 'stabs Keefe with K-bar' that's easy. What does he have to do, Gertrude?

Gertrude: 'looking at dead Keefe' um, pretend to be a model and wear girl's underwear and bra?

Jackson: 'wicked smirk' I love this dare 'grabs popcorns'

Gertrude: 'revives Keefe' Alright, here's your……..costume, come back in ten seconds!

Keefe: 'screams and ran to change' I AM GONNA TELL MY MOMMY ABOUT THIS!!

Gertrude: riiiiiight, does he always have to scream?

Jackson: gay guys, you know the those types that screams?

Gertrude: uh-huh. Keefe?! Are you ready?!?

Keefe: 'comes out in his…..costume'

Gertrude: heee heee 'clicks Runway into the room'

Keefe: NO WAY! I am not going to-

Gertrude: 'waves contract'

Keefe: 'death glare'

Gertrude: now, walk!

Keefe: 'cat walks across the Runway to upbeat music'

Jackson: 'rolling on the ground with laughter'

Keefe: 'finishes the cat-walk and pounced on Jackson' DIE! YOU SLIMY HAMSTER!

Everyone: what the-

Gertrude: well, I guess had enough for now 'background: Keefe and Jackson rolling on the ground, strangling each other' and apparently everyone's having a good time…..killing each other 'background: Keefe and Jackson still on the ground, Lisa's dad is wearing a cheerleader costume with a big J in the front yelling "go Jackson!"' WE will be having some new characters joining us next week, so stay tuned! Bye!

Jackson: 'strangling Keefe and looking straight at the camera' and remember, I am the most awesome- 'gets knocked out by Keefe'


	4. Episode 3

Chapter 3

Gertrude: alright, welcome back to our show, now, let's not waste any time. First for all, I would like to introduce some new characters onto our show! First, we have Dr. Carlisle from Twilight!

Carlisle: Damn! I knew I should not have signed the contract disguised as Edward's report card

Gertrude: Secondly, we have Neo aka Thomas Anderson from the Matrix!

Neo: I can't believe Trinity persuaded me into doing this!

Gertrude: yeah, that's about it. However, there are no requests for you guys..........YET. So for this show, you can relax and watch the others suffer. Now, Jackson, read the first dare for us.

Jackson: Fine, okay, the first dare is from **GodzPrincess:** **Make Jackson sing "cuppycake gumdrops", complete with lisp, in the middle of times square at new years eve dressed in a bunny costume :}**

Neo: on second thought, I love this show

Jackson: If I have my K-bar-

Gertrude: which you don't. 'poofs Jackson into an Easter bunny costume' now, off to the times square

_Suddenly, everyone finds themselves in the middle of the Times Square during New Year eve. Everyone is waiting for the countdown._

Jackson: Well, at least nobody notices me…

Gertrude: 'takes out a large microphone' HEY EVERYONE! JACKSON FROM THE RED EYE IS GONNA SING US A SONG!

Jackson: …and you have to make this public!

Gertrude: 'innocent shrug'

_Suddenly, everyone's attention's on Jackson_

Random person: He's wearing a bunny suit!

Everyone: laughs

Jackson: fine! Let's get this over and done with!

Gertrude: passes Jackson a microphone'

Jackson: **You're my Honeybunch, Sugarplum**

**Pumpy-umpy-umpkin, You're my Sweetie Pie**

**You're my Cuppycake, Gumdrop**

**Snoogums-Boogums, You're the Apple of my Eye**

**And I love you so and I want you to know**

**That I'll always be right here**

**And I love to sing sweet songs to you**

**Because you are so dear**

Everyone: 'applauds'

Carlisle: That's so gay

Gertrude: well, that's the whole point of this show 'poofs everyone back into the show room' alright, Lisa, read the next dare for us please

Lisa: okay. This one is from **Some Random Fangirl: I dare Keefe to make out with Jackson **hmm

Jackson: Why is it always me?!!???!?!?!?

Keefe: and me?

Jackson: shut up

Gertrude, well, shouldn't you two be carrying out the dare?

Keefe: no way, I am going to Canada

Gertrude: it's okay, I cancelled your flight, and you can stay here with us!

Keefe: WHAT!?! YOU DID WHAT!?

Gertrude: uh-huh, so, the dare, please.

Neo: please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me please don't do it in front of me

Keefe: FINE! 'Kisses Jackson'

Neo: 'spasms'

Everyone: 'chokes'

Gertrude: okay, you can stop now

Jackson: did you poke your tongue into my-

Gertrude: OKAY! NEXT DARE!

Carlisle: why are you shouting?

Gertrude: Did you hear what they did?!?

Carlisle: yeah, but its nature for a guy to kiss a girl…

Gertrude: Carlisle, you are wrong, Keefe is a guy

Carlisle: KEEFE IS A GUY?!?!?!

Pause

Everyone: OMG! KEEFE'S A GUY!

Neo: 'sniggers'

Gertrude: Yeah, he's a guy. Okay, since Carlisle is still in shock over that particular issue, Neo, you read the next dare for us.

Neo: No, I need to get back to Trinity

Gertrude: you signed a contract

Neo: Since when did I sign a contract?

Gertrude: Trinity made you sign it when it was disguised as a document that says (I will be forever yours)

Neo: TRINITY!

Gertrude: Okay, dude, read the dare

Neo: fine! This one is from **itsbetterwithjam: ****I dare Jackson and Lisa to switch their clothes for five minutes. All of it! Lol**

Jackson: wow! Finally a dare that does not involve guys!

Lisa: I am not changing clothes with him! I am wearing my best high-heels

Jackson: You are wearing high-heels?!?!

Lisa: Yeah

Jackson: 'sobs'

Gertrude: well, this seems interesting. 'Switches Lisa and Jackson's clothes'

Jackson: 'in a pink skirt with matching pink blouse completed with bangles and a pair of five-inch high-heels'

Lisa: 'in a business suit completed shoes that are too big for her'

Jackson: damn! These clothes don't feel right in…….certain places

Lisa: gasp! You are going to spoil my high-heels!

Jackson: why must you wear pink!?!?

Lisa: Why did you not change your underwear since yesterday?!?!?!?!?!

Pause

Neo: sucks to be you, Lisa

Jackson: 'struggling to not trip in the high-heels'

Carlisle: 'sniggers'

Gertrude: alright, next dare-

Lisa: Wait, are you going to change our clothes back?

Gertrude: Well, the request says five minutes

Jackson: most…painful….five…minutes….of….my….life…

Gertrude: okay, next dare. Carlisle, read it for us!

Carlisle: this one is from **Liz: I dare Lisa to strip down into some sexy lingerie and give Jackson a hot lap dance! I dare Jackson to give her a good tip! ;)**

Gertrude: Okay, good one, this one. Fine, Lisa, get rid of Jackson's clothes and change into these 'passes her the sexy lingerie'

Lisa: that's so sick

Gertrude: too bad, you signed a contract

Lisa: I am not gonna change

Gertrude: 'poofs her into the sexy lingerie'

Lisa: HEY! DON'T DO THAT!?!?!?!

Gertrude: alright, give Jackson a lap dance.

Lisa: 'gave Jackson a three second lap dance'

Gertrude: Wait! The request says a 'hot lap dance' not a three seconds thing

Lisa: 'sets the chair that Jackson is sitting in on fire and did a three milliseconds lap dance for him' there, a HOT lap dance

Pause

Neo: that's smart

Gertrude: THAT'S CHEATING!!!!

Jackson: I am on fire

Gertrude: 'forgetting Jackson' okay, continue to our next-

Jackson: I AM ON FIRE?!?!!?!

Gertrude: oh, yeah, well, um, where's the fire extinguisher?

Neo: somewhere here

Gertrude: that's helpful

Carlisle: I passed by it on my way here, its somewhere under your seat

Gertrude: oh, okay. 'Picks up the fire extinguisher but don't know how to use it' uh, does anyone know how to use this?!

Carlisle: um, read the instruction

Gertrude: yeah, okay. First, twist the red knob on the side of the fire extinguisher and aim nozzle at target 'aims nozzle at Jackson'

Jackson: 'burnt to a crisp'

Gertrude: damn! We can't continue without him.

Neo: does that mean that we get a day off?!?! 'Looks hopeful'

Gertrude: yeah, for today, and come back next show!

Neo: . Trinity


	5. Episode 4

Gertrude: welcome to the red eye truth or dare. Many apologies with regards to the previous episode. Due to some.....rather disturbing events 'peeps at Jackson' we had to cut the program short. So, in order to make up for it, we will make today's event longer.

Everyone: 'groans'

Gertrude: As you know, some new characters joined us last episode. So don't forget to place some dares for them as well.

Carlisle: you had to bring that up

Neo: totally dude

Gertrude: Now, let's not waste any more time. Neo read the first dare for us.

Neo: 'death glare' this one is from the **MidnightThief15****: ****This is really funny. Hm...let's see...oh! I know! Have Jackson sing a Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana song while Lisa gives him a lap-dance while wearing a mermaid outfit! Lol. XD**

Jackson: jeesh, I am popular, aren't I?

Lisa: well, this is going to be easy for Jackson. He memorized all of Hannah Montana's song by heart.

Pause

Jackson: !

Lisa: oops, I forgot. I am not suppose to say that

Carlisle: you memorized all her songs by heart? 'eye twitches'

Jackson: 'blushing' no! !!

Carlisle: 'thinking' even Rosalie can't do that

Neo: who is Hannah Montana?

Everyone: 'gasp' NEO!

Gertrude: never mind, you will know. Jackson?

Jackson: wait, I need to decide which one I should sing!

Gertrude: 'eye-rolls' Lisa, I need to change you into a mermaid

Lisa: WHAT?!? But the dare said a MERMAID OUTFIT!

Gertrude: well, we can break the rules sometimes……….

Carlisle: 'death glare'

Gertrude: Yeeeeeep! Fine!

Carlisle: Jasper taught me the glare. Works every time

Gertrude: 'gives Lisa a mermaid outfit' here you go

Lisa: 'death glares but fails miserably'

_After a few minutes, Lisa came out dressed like Ariel the mermaid_

Guys on the show: 'drool'

Neo: I love this dare

Lisa: shut up you perv! 'Slaps Neo with the tail on the costume'

Carlisle: I must remain loyal to Esme I must remain loyal to Esme I must remain loyal to Esme

I must remain loyal to Esme I must remain loyal to Esme I must remain loyal to Esme

I must remain loyal to Esme I must remain loyal to Esme I must remain loyal to Esme

I must remain loyal to Esme I must remain loyal to Esme I must remain loyal to Esme

I must remain loyal to Esme I must remain loyal to Esme I must remain loyal to Esme

Gertrude: 'sniggers' hey Jackson, are you done?

Jackson: YES! I shall sing best of both worlds! I loved this song since...........you get it

Lisa: This is like the worst dare EVER!

Neo and Carlisle: I disagree

Jackson: 'starts singing while Lisa gives him a lap dance'

**Oh yea  
Come on**

You get the limo out front  
Hottest styles, every shoe, every color

Yea when your famous it can be kinda fun  
It's really you but no one ever discovers

In some ways you're just like all your friends  
But on stage you're a star

You get the best of both worlds  
Chillin' out, take it slow  
Then you rock out the show

You get the best of both worlds  
Mix it all together and you know that  
It's the best of both worlds  
The best of both worlds

You go the movie premiers  
(Is that Orlando Bloom?)  
Hear your songs on the radio  
Livin' two lives is a little weird  
But school's cool cuz nobody knows

Yea you get to be a small town girl  
But big time when you play your guitar

You get the best of both worlds  
Chillin' out take it slow  
Then you rock out the show

You get the best of both worlds  
Mix it all together and you know that  
It's the best of both  
You know the best of both worlds

Pictures and autographs  
You get your face in all the magazines  
The best part's that  
You get to be who ever you wanna be

Yea best of both  
You get the best of both  
Come on, best of both

Who would of thought that a girl like me  
Would double as a superstar?

You get the best of both worlds  
Chillin' out, take it slow  
Then you rock out the show

You get the best of both worlds  
Mix it all together and you know that  
It's the best

You get the best of both worlds  
Without the shades and the hair  
You can go anywhere

You get the best of both girls  
Mix it all together  
Oh yea  
It's so much better cuz you know  
You've got the best of both world

Neo: 'drooling'

Carlisle: 'busy taking pictures and taping Jackson's dare'

Keefe: 'is oh-so-freakin-jealous'

Carlisle: I am so gonna send this to Alice so that she can put this online

Neo: I am so gonna ask Lisa out

Pause

Jackson: 'threw Lisa off his lap and tried to strangle Neo, Neo lazily held him back with one finger'

Neo: dude, I am The One, I have super powers and you don't so back off

Gertrude: 'clears throat'

Everyone: 'stops fighting'

Gertrude: Neo's right, Jackson, back off. Joe, read the next dare for us

Joe: okay, this one is from **xLoz: ****hahahahaha that made me laugh, a lot! hmm, let's see... I dare Lisa to stare at Jackson intensly, into his creppe gorgeous blue eyes.  
hmm, ley's see what may happen... .P**

Lisa: this is waaaaaaaay better than the mermaid dare. 'Stares into Jackson's eyes and starts melting…..literally'

_Everyone watched in amusement as Lisa slowly dissolved into a puddle of………Lisa_

Carlisle: wow, that's……..powerful. Edward should see this!

Joe: thanks, Jackson, for making my daughter into a smoothie

Jackson: 'creepy grin that matches his creepy eyes' you're welcome

Joe: yikes

Gertrude: this is unexpected. I mean his eyes are creepy but-

Keefe: I can do it too! 'Stares at a random female audience'

Random female audience: 'pukes'

Keefe: nope, maybe not

Gertrude: m-kay, Jackson, now that you have successfully made Lisa a……….smoothie, let's continue to the next dare.

Keefe: oooooo! I wanna read it! Pick me pick me!

Everyone: uuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhh okay?

Keefe: the next dare is from **Patriot16: ****I'M BACK! Jackson, sorry about making you dance the ballet. Here's my dare: I dare you and Lisa to play 7 Minutes in Heaven.**

Jackson: I am not kissing a puddle

Gertrude: 'changes Lisa Smoothie back to Lisa'

Lisa: 'shivering' must….not….look…..into……creepy…..eyes

Gertrude: 'shoves Lisa towards Jackson' Carry out your dare, please

Jackson: where? HERE?!?!?!

Gertrude: no you idiot in that closet 'points to a closet that just magically appeared'

Jackson: 'shrugs' whatever 'drags Lisa into the closet'

Gertrude: your seven minutes starts now!

Everyone: 'waiting in silent'

_Seven minutes later………………………….._

Lisa: 'burst out of the closet' OMG! YES! I AM FINALLY OUT OF THAT PLACE!

Joe: What did that boy do to you?!?!! 'Glares at Jackson who is sashaying out of the closet'

Lisa: he kissed me for the first two minutes then switched to scratching himself under the armpit for the next five.

Pause

Jackson: what?! It was really itchy

Gertrude: 'chokes'

Keefe: Dude that was a waste of five minutes!

Neo: yeah, totally

Gertrude: next dare 'faints'

Neo: okay, this one is from **VoldemortsNipple**

Everyone: 'bursts out laughing'

Neo: **I dare Jackson to strip down into a flimsy womens thong to the song "magnetic baby" by the Semi Precious Weapons =)** by the way, who is voldemort?

Gertrude: 'eye twitches'

Carlisle: Even I know who is Voldemort; he killed my son Edward

Pause, crickets

Carlisle: ……who then came back to life

Pause, crickets

Carlisle: …….as a vampire

Pause

Carlisle: ……a vegetarian vampire

Pause, crickets

Carlisle: …….you get the picture, okay let's move on!

Jackson: well, the woman's thong sounds okay but I don't know the lyrics, can we skip this dare?

Gertrude: Ummm….. 'nervous glance at audience'

Carlisle: I agree, let's just skip it! 'Is shot by **VoldermortsNipple**'

Gertrude: Okay, I will let you off for this one time. Carlisle, read the next dare for us!

Carlisle: m-kay. The next dare is from **Someone: I dare Keefe to kill himself cause he annoys me lol. and then everyone (including Gertrude and the security guards) can spit on him! lmao:)**

Keefe: WHAT?!?!?!!?

Jackson: thank you **Someone**

Carlisle: you should be happy, I can't kill myself no matter how much I want to and how much I tried

Keefe: HAPPY!?!?!? Did you hear what the mad vampire just said?!?! I should be HAPPY!?!?!?!

Gertrude: just…..kill yourself

Keefe: but…………. 'Realizes that arguing is hopeless' awww, fine! 'Stabs himself'

Jackson: Yippeee!!!

Everyone: 'spits on Keefe'

Jackson: That's like the best dare EVER!

Gertrude: That's not very nice. Anyway, we have come to the end of this episode. Join us in the next one, coming right up!

Carlisle: Who wants to hear my-past-extremely-boring story?

Everyone: 'evacuates the room in less than a milli-second'

Carlisle: 'only one left' I'll take that as a no


End file.
